The Cumberland Post

The Cumberland Post
My Backyard, Six Miles from the Cumberland River

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Cumberland Post Gets $1 Million Federal Grant, Endorses Obama

The Cumberland Post is pleased to announce that we are the recipients of a $1 Million grant from the U.S. Department of Energy. The money will be used to develop windmill driven power for using computers to access and blog on the internet. The Post made no application for the grant but we were contacted by the Obama Administration yesterday. An enormous black, hybrid powered Escalade pulled into our driveway and delivered a package which included a kit for developing the experimental windmills, a check for $1 Million, and a letter and contract. Sec. Stephen Chu himself was driving and made the delivery.

After carefully examining the kit materials, the Post has decided to accept the government proposal. Here are the windmills we'll be using in this experiment.



We like the patriotism shown by the two with the American flag motifs and we deeply appreciate the international and diverse appeal of the other two.

Also, in related news, we have decided to endorse President Obama for a second term. Those of us on the staff have noted in the past that reasonable people do sometimes change their minds and that's the case this time. Although we disagree with almost all of Obama's policies and despise his racially divisive approach, we think he makes a lot of sense in certain areas. Nobody's perfect.

The Post will be offline for the next four weeks as we take the first of several vacations, this one in Aruba.

10 comments:

  1. Dan, you know, this almost makes sense with all of the other craziness coming out of Washington!
    Great satire!

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  2. Dang. This is almost as good as winning the lottery, eh? I like those windmills, too.

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  3. Hey. just a'thinkin, maybe ah cud put two of 'em air windmill's at tha end of the drive way, maybe spruce up tha place a little, don't ya know. Kindee like Buck's flerminger's.

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  4. Brilliant! as the Brits say. This takes the cake for clever satire, perfect for April Fools Day. I hope you get a million hits--no fooling!

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  5. Scooney, I can getcha a good deal on them there windmills through my new friends in DC.

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  6. Buck, I got a feelin' this could be even better than the lottery 'cause I didn't even have to buy a ticket!

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  7. George, unfortunately the fools are in DC and not on a ship.

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  8. Jeanne, a million hits would be mighty nice, but I'll probably get about 12. By the way, I stopped by your blog Scandia South yesterday. I really enjoyed your review of Downton Abbey.

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  9. Nyuk.

    Excellent, Dan. Enjoy Aruba.

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